January 1/26/2020

Have you ever dreamt of simply disappearing? Spending months, years, setting up a mold of life, and then one day simply leaving it all to start anew. Yes indeed these people would wonder, what ever did happen to that man, but life would get on, and eventually we would pass. Why not run wild with the river. Why not surf the clouds. High as a kite. Basking in the sun. Kiss the heavens. Free as a bird. Run baby run, that’s all I could think. There seems to be two paths to this thing and now I currently split the time. One more push and I might be to the edge. What waits below I’m not sure but highly interested. Hold the pedal down, speed toward the edge, let go fo the steering wheel and simply fly. Splash. Now we’re talking. Now we’re really in it my friend. I love the company of rain. Talkative, yet never with much to say, just the same old, same old. Tonight the howling wind has made its way through. Fresh off the cusp of the hills it really gains its confidence around this area. Its funny how it all turns. It, us, you, them, all of it, moving around in constant motion, constant change. Us, unaware of it all, I suppose. A perfect happening. I digress.

Where then might you disappear? Where too might you run if you had one tank of gas, an eighth of grass and a soul full of “who gives a fuck”?

My Commitment To Courage

I’ve always been victim to a fascination of the outdoors. More specifically I would say being lost with in it. There is something about being free of a pressing reminder of man that is so liberating. In this space my breath is smoother, my shoulders relaxed. It all feels so right.

My recent move to California (I say recent when really I’ve been here a good 10 months) has especially played a significant role in clarifying this realization. Here there are so many escapes into the wild that I am full in the swing of it. As many sunsets as I can, I strive to hike among the Redwoods, peering at the cotton candy colored streaks of clouds that break through the gap in branches. On weekends, I hug the coast, scaling the side of sea kissed cliffs, exploring a world I’ve never seen face to face. Here there is such honesty, no denying what truly is. There is no illusion. Here there are no signs, no cell signals. Only sounds of seals echo from the distant island of rocks to the shore where I sit in the swirl of it all. No other thoughts seem to cross my mind. I am completely capsulated by the experience. Why is it that these portraits of knee-high wheat grass, sprinkled with the profiles of wild flowers have such a control over my soul? This feels so like home.

As I find myself now I’m comfortably sitting on the balcony of our apartment. A tiger stripped sky of baby blue and salmon clouds greets my eyes. I sit here often to reflect. To think on the process of it all, to explore what possibilities exist in my mind. Today, and honestly recently as a whole, I have been grappling with this idea of escape. In one corner I can see I have found what makes me happier than most everything in this world. Yet opposite of this empowering sensation, a beaten and tamed mind points out the flaws and faults of my plan. I have worked with tools in my past, and witnessed the hold of a strong vice, I have in my younger days been victim to the burning result of an Indian Rug Burn (I apologize for the insensitive naming) yet I have never met something with such a strong grasp as my whipped mind. For every irrefutable attempt I make my mind finds a way to bend my words, highlight my insecurities, and fill me with anxiety from the valueless perceived thoughts of others. Like so many ideas dead before fruition this one as well often finds its way to the back of my focus, out of sight, residing in the shadow of thought until one more encounter with these scenes draw the sparks back out.

I must admit I have gotten quite tired of this process. Committed, uncommitted, fully bought in, fully in hiding, this tug of war of sorts has continually taken a toll. Conscious of this angst, this teetering feeling of fulfillment, I have as of lately become far stronger in my beliefs. In the last few days, this life free of a “societally prescribed plan” has continually been building a roaring heat in side my chest. I can feel my breaking point must be near. No longer do the gadgets and gizmos seem so enticing, no longer does the security of retirement seem so significant if the risk of life was never taken. I am deciding today that this fear-based argument, which keeps me stuck in my ways, is no longer in charge. There is no point in thought around this topic, only action shall reside. Why debate with myself when I can simply choose.

To be completely honest I am absent of confidence in how this decision may unfold. My most hopeful guess however, is that it will all work out, funny enough things always seem to. But there is always uncertainty, and while in the past I was quite fond of inviting in this gap in self-efficacy today I have closed the door and locked the house.  Rather than fantasize on the millions of wrongs that could arise, let me call their bluff, let me invite life to unfold in the way I feel whole in. When the cards are down, and I have done this, then we will truly only know.

 

I must now take a moment to pause and apologize. It seems in the midst of this ravishing build up I have spent extensive time describing the issue but not the plan of solution. Where I am now in life, I have been extremely fortunate for many things. I have a family that floods me with support when needed, a “path” that is promising, supported by a good square job and the potential for more, and many possessions that I am extremely grateful for.  However, many of these items as of late have lost their value. Rather than my family and relationships with others, I do not seem to be able to find the importance of living conventionally. Having said this my plan is to relieve myself of this assumed responsibility. To live minimally, in an old van, with nothing more than what I need. To take each day with a new investment in the now, to explore my mind, and what I truly believe in, all from the nomadic shell of a Chevy automobile.

To begin such a journey I must first start with ridding of my current excess. To put it more bluntly, I need to sell all of my shit! Using various techniques I will gradually eliminate the items that fill empty space in my room. If I don’t need it, and it serves no true purpose, I would rather pass it on to someone who is in need. I certainly suspect this will be tough as many emotional bonds are built between one and their items. I am no stranger to this, I have surely felt this struggle before. However it is the growth in this process, this pushing against my doubt, that is the inexperienced frontier I look forward to witnessing. What “Me” lies on the other side of following my passion? What transformation does honest and completed commitment yield? I imagine I am soon to find out.

As the future continues to unravel into the now I plan to take you along on this journey.  Through this blog, and other mediums I hope to express my thoughts, my feelings, & my experiences, as honest and real as can be. In this process of doing what I feel is right for myself I additionally want to work on being okay with expressing that.

In completion of these thoughts, I must now begin the process earlier described of releasing my belongings. I plan to document this process each day, with updates of my success, my failure, and lessons learned along the way. Whether you decide to follow along each day, or maybe just stop by once and then never again, I thank you for doing so.

What a mysterious journey lies head, I must now begin.

 

7/6/18

 

Meeting Mason

I remember waking up those frigid cold mornings. The window, which nearly kissed the side of my bed, was casted with frost around the tips of its fingers. The center however gave site to the purest blend of blue and white December had ever seen.

I had nothing to look forward to that day so I proceeded to throw on my boots and snag myself a jacket. I layered the jacket with a wool flannel and caped things off with a thick and furry stocking cap.

Their was a wonderful path on the west side of town that tip toed the ice caped river. Like young boys chasing one another through the park the path hugged every shank and dogwood the river could throw it. It really was a calm place that time of year.

I made my way down the winding trail, before I decided to soak in the scenery on a snowcapped bench. I brushed off the snow and took a load of my boots. There was a terrific overcast grey sky, one that felt cold, yet very welcoming at the exact same time. The trees completely bare, like a child fresh from the womb, reached their arms high and wide, grasping for any warmth they could. The ground was hard this time of year but the fresh snow gave decent cushion.

As I peered into the surroundings I felt a connection with the images around me. I had never felt such energy from the environment. I closed my eyes and began to imagine the face of my surroundings.

I saw a weathered man. One who had seen prosperous fields in the warm summers, as well as the cold tundra’s of winter that showed no hope of growth. Deep wrinkles in his forehead told stories of trials and tribulations. His eyebrows bushier than I would have imagined showed a film of travel in the dusty west of Texas. His eyes portrayed hurt, unexpected goodbyes, and a hope that this cant be how it all ends.

I felt in the presence of the old man. I whispered to the sky to breathe easy. To know that no matter the length of the seasons, no matter the severity of heat, or the despair of cold, we would be there for him.

 

You And I.

When the day comes, and the heart inside my chest slows it pace, when there Is no more time to waste, I will die, just like you, and you just like I

When I transcend to the heavens above or the depths far beneath, I will no longer question the validity of the feat, for I rest amongst my fellow sinners and saints.

When I settle in to this timeless life and grip deep the truth, you are just like me, me just like you.

Then I will grasp the question of time, that while we are living we are all of the same kind.

Though skin of different shades, the flesh still remains, a like as it has since we first uttered our name.

What a tragedy we have believed our very own senses, for while we think with our minds they yet remain senseless.

Our eyes they deceived us, in believing its true, now I truly can see, you are I and I am you.

From the first moments of light, to the last moments of breath I realize we are no different, than that of the rest.

So live with the ideal that we are all much alike, for when we die it makes not a difference, nor black or nor white.

• Trent

 

Shower Talk

The top 10 things millionaires do in the morning! The 5 things every successful person does before they start their day! How often do we see lists such as these. It seems every week there is a new list, all claiming to hold the essentials to an effective routine. What we seem to find though is a lot of these lists contain the same old boring information. Drink water, make your bed, workout, at this point these are no longer secrets at all. In fact they are more common knowledge than secrets. But today I believe I have one task that hasn’t been added to any of those lists. Im not claiming this is a secret, in fact its far from it. If anything it is a tip or tool you can use to set your mindset and the direction for your day! I hope you’ll take this recommendation to heart. Use it, master it, and begin living each and every day to its fullest potential.

It’s called shower talk! You’ve probably heard the phrase pillow talk. This is nothing like that! This is a powerful tool! This sets the tone for your day! This prompts you to have the confidence, courage, and energy to accomplish all of the tasks you have set for yourself!

The best part is performing shower talk is super easy! This is how it works. Each morning when you wake up and take a shower, spend a few minutes talking to yourself. Not half asleep, not unenthused talking to yourself, but energetic, emotional, life filled talking to yourself. Speak on your confidence, your mood, your success.Crate the energy of your day with your emotions and the words that encapsulate them. For example you may say full heartedly, “I’m unstoppable, I accomplish all my goals to the best of my abilities and always do an excellent job!” Repeating this a few times you will begin to engrave this into your mind and your subconscious.

Pack as much emotion and feeling into these words as possible. Make them full of weight, make them real! Once you begin doing this on a regular bases you will get the hang of it even better. You will begin to create certain phrases you like to repeat and that truly strike a core with you.

The way you begin you day is essential to success. If you start it with no emotion, excitement, or optimism, you will have results just alike. Setting your mindset from the very start is an excellent way to set the tone and make a pledge to your own mind that you will demand your day is a certain way. I hope that you can use this and what ever tactics you enjoy in creating the best life possible!!

The House Built On Habits

The following is an excerpt from an Ebook I will be publishing. The book takes a operational approach at organizing our lives, and then finding the correct plan to follow so we can achieve our greatest goals. This particular excerpt is from Chapter 2, which speaks on finding out what habits make up our lives. I hope you enjoy!

“No matter what aspect of our life we have habits. Eating or dieting habits, sleeping habits, work habits, driving habits, the list could go on forever and ever. While we often times seem to glance over these habits, they play a vital role in the formation of our lives. How often do we hear someone complain about the way his or her life is going? How often do we hear someone gripe that they can never seem to loose weight and they were just born to be big? For example, here’s a story about a friend of mine. We will call him Jim for the time being. Jim is a great guy. Jim works full time, is always on time, pays rent and covers his bills but never seems to be able to get ahead. Jim would love to travel and experience new things and places but never has the money to do so. When you take an objective view of Jim’s life you can see that he has a few habits that are restricting him from doing what he really wants to do. For example Jim enjoys going out for drinks after work with his friends. In fact he will do this a few times each week. What Jim thinks he enjoys though is actually causing a great shortcoming in his life. So often we look for instant satisfaction rather than investing in satisfaction for the rest of our lives. We wish to be happy now rather than make the decision that will bring happiness to us for years to come. Pertaining to Jim this is his exact problem. Though he enjoys going out with his friends, in the long run it is causing more of a problem for him than anything else. This is a habit Jim has created. By ritually going out with friends he falls short in reaching his potential. Change your habits change your life. If Jim shifted his habits from going out for drinks from a few times a week, to maybe just once a week, his habits would begin to support his dream. With this huge leap in progress Jim would quickly begin to live the life he truly dreams of.

Jim is just an example, but Jim could be any one of us. We all have habits that don’t support our main goal. We must face these facts. We must acknowledge our habits that do not aide in our success. Often times it takes a close examination of our daily routine to truly uncover our habits. We become so used to a certain way of doing things we often forget we are even doing them. We must take a fine tooth comb to our routine to truly find the cracks in our foundation. Below I have left lines to do a bit of writing. Weather you wish to print these pages out, or write in your own journal I encourage you to do so.   Take a few minutes and think deep about the habits you currently perform. Some will be good some will be bad, some will be hard to admit to, but we must be honest. If you constantly wake up an hour late write that down. Do not pass things off as flukes or every once in a while ordeals. If we lie to ourselves about our habits, our life will be a representation of those lies and we will not acquire what we strive for.”

 

An Uncommon Friend.

Why is it that we are so damn afraid of challenges? They scare us sure, but why? The fear of uncertainty, the fear of failure, these are both valid explanations. But really what I want to know is who gave challanges so much power. Who deemed them boss? Who let them control so much of what we do? It is with much sadness that i say the answer to all those questions is us. Maybe it is not directly the challenge but more of the sensations we feel when coming face to face with a challenge that we fear. The weight we have allowed a “challenge” to carry is astronomical. For example, say one day a wonderful idea pops into your head! Geniuses! But then the opposition calls in their fire power. An array of challenges pops into your head. I don’t know the right people, I don’t have enough money, I’ve never tried something like that before. All of these are the challenges we so often face, and all of these are phrases that have effected our lives in more ways than we can imagine. Think for a second what your life would be if instead of fearing and running away from a challenge, you embraced it. What if you didn’t see “challenges” as a obstacle or road block but instead saw them as an opportunity for growth, new knowledge, and to develop yourself as a more in tuned human being. 

You see I believe the issue lies in our perspective. “Perspective is everything”, a phrase we so often hear, and so often let pass without the slightest marination on its validity. But you see its true. The way you view something drastically changes the results of it. If you see something as negative you will soon yield negative results. If you see something in a positive light however you will then see positive results. The output results always mimics the input emotions. 

Looking back into challenges specifically, I ask that the next time you are met with one you embrace it. I beg you swing your doors wide open, wave it in and treat it to a meal. Because with the correct perspective we see “challenges” are actually packed with positives.One of which I’d like to share . While it may seem quite contrary, challenges in fact create the happiest and most joyous moments of our existence. Please allow me to expand my thoughts.

When we are faced with a challenge we often times sink in happiness. We may feel overwhelmed, sad, or maybe depressed. But because we can feel these empty, cold emotions it means we can also feel extreme joy and glee. If we were never able to walk through the deep steep valleys and feel their emptiness we would never reach the magnificent mountain tops and the exuberant happiness they posses. With out sadness we would only feel extreme happiness, which would become a normalized feeling and would no longer feel quite so extraordinary. The wonderful feelings of happiness would completely disappear if were not as equally familiar with the feelings of despair. So in reality we should thank challenges for arising. Not only do they allow opportunity to grow and ever improve ourselves they also allow us to feel the saddest of emotions. But right behind the saddest of emotions is the happiest of emotions ready to take their place.

The truth is I really hope you think for a second before judging a challenge that arises. Do not be quick to label it in one direction or the other. Allow it to marinate. Look for the positives that will come out of it. Chances are if you do this, you will find it may be in your best interest to make challenges an uncommon friend.

 

Be easy my friends

-Trev

 

P.S. I am in the process of creating an ebook. The book will describe a spelled out plan to acquiring your dreams through using visualization, emotions, and the correct habits. Please like this post if you may be interested in grabbing a copy once its completed.

 

 

 

 

P

Envy Of The World…

“People envy others lives so much… they forget to take the time to work on their own”

The quote above is a thought that splashed into my mind this evening. Why are we so obsessed over other peoples lives? Wouldn’t it be logical that if we saw something, such as a certain lifestyle, that we would like to acquire we would develop a plan to attain it, and then begin working that plan in our actual life. But we don’t. In fact I’m here to say that we do far the opposite, and unfortunately so. We so easily become completely encapsulated by the glitz and glamour or the drama and heartbreak of others lives, that we have completely forgotten that exact same lifestyle is available to you. There is no real substantial difference between your celebrity idol and yourself. You are both the same organs, but comprised of flesh and blood nearly identical. Whats different is the mindset, its the vision that varies. Those that we envy have the mentality of just that. They see themselves as stars, as idols, as role models to the rest of us. But us, are minds, so weak and unfocused, have visions of the stars lives. Not for our own acquisition,  oh heavens no we would never be so bold. But simply out of envy. Out of a burning desire to be like the big famous star but deep down know you would never make it to such a life. At the moment of initial realization we may briefly feel despair. But in a blink of an eye we normalize that feeling. We befriend it and let it live in the same home as our truest aspirations, dreams, and goals. Its presence is the epitome of overwhelming. This is no life to live. This is a life to fear.

Flat out, face to face heres the God Damn truth. You Have The Capability To Live Any Life You Choose. Your biggest oppressor is you. Its your mind, its your negative thoughts, its your lack of focus. But the greatest news ever is that you can still change all of this. Weather you have the rest of your life to live or only a sparing few seconds. You can always change it. Nothing is unreachable. Right this minute I want you to think of one thing, just one thing that you want to acquire, change, or become in the future. Right those words down in the most permanent marker you can. Get those word tattooed on your unaware skin. Repeat, dream, and visualize of acquiring this every day. Pour your emotion into the image of your dream. With out emotion, and honest sensations, this will never work. As you begin to visualize your dream and pack it full of emotions, you’ll realize your actions are running congruently with your aspirations. Your are taking the steps to success. You are creating the foundation of the life you so desperately now reach out for.

I want to congratulate you my friend, cause you are on your way. You are on your way to whatever it is you aspire for. What ever it is you want to bring to reality. Its on its way. And  I couldn’t be happier for you. Run with this feeling and share it with others. One by one we can transform the world into a loving and positive environment. This is the gift we have, to create the wildest realities we can possibly dream of. So start dreaming, and start creating. Best of luck, I can already see you there.

 

• Trevor

The Altered Mirror Image

For how ever long you have been alive you have been making efforts towards establishing who you are as a person. You have been creating and evaluating your morals and values. You have been forming your likes and dislikes. And then as we all do you have expressed this to the world to see. Maybe through the clothes you wear or the music you listen to. In some way or another you have tried to convey what it is you stand for to the outside world. In the last few years though as social media outlets have begun to capture a larger percent of our attention it seems we have created an alternative life as well. Here is where a great imbalance has been created. In the youth of today I see a glaring issue we must confront. The importance of ones online presence and the ideals they represent in this virtual world have grown to greatly outweigh the importance of the image they convey in the real world. As we have become more and more controlled by the likes and dislikes of our peers we have become overly concentrated on how we are perceived via profile page. Because of this we now have a magnificent disconnect. With such effort being poured into a “coded” world we have forgotten to express our true intentions in reality. We no longer see kids and young adults greatly infatuated by music, art, and emotions as we did in times past. The greater importance is now placed on making sure your profile pictures will get enough likes or retweets. While on a base level there is nothing wrong with having an online presence there is something wrong with the youth not expressing the same viewpoints in reality. I propose we must transition the mindset to a state of expressing a parallel image in both realities. If one feels confident enough to perceive an image of themselves online, they should feel confident enough to perceive this same image to their peers in real life. I truly believe if this were done we would see a great increase in the emotional equilibrium in peoples lives. Those of us in this skewed mindset have allowed the approval of virtual friends to hold greater weight than the real friends we have around us. More than likely the majority of online profile users are “friends”, on social media sites, with people they rarely even associate with, or worse yet barely even know. Who decided these people’s opinions holds such a monumental weight? We must become aware to the fact that these people’s viewpoints hold very little value in our lives. Ultimately an effort must be made for the youth of today to feel confident enough to express the values they hold online to the real world. I truly believe if this were to be done the world could be graced with the presence of some of the greatest writers, artists, musicians, and creative we have yet to see. Online we feel free to express our innermost drives and sensations. I ask please, go into the real world and share these as well. You doing so will only spark a revolution and encourage others to do the exact same thing. The power to change the world and the way things are done is truly in you hands. The choice is up to you. Allow the world to continue on its path, or change it for a more progressive, expressive, and fulfilled world for all to love.

The Disappearing Mind

Have we gotten the entire world figured out? Do we have all the crooks and cranny’s of life mapped out in great detail? Though I wish so full heartedly we did I must honestly say we do not. If this is the case then, why have we treated our minds as if we do? When one studies thought or philosophy we must flip the pages deep into history. Why do we not look towards the philosophers of today? Could it possibly be that there are none to be found in the chaos of modern society? I see a great issue with the way the world operates today. While we are busy burying our noses in textbooks and notes on data we have slid the book of thought under the table. While we have continued the efforts to advance our knowledge in the field of concrete data, we have forgotten to place the same efforts to developing thought. The world of today is as wild and crazy and in trouble as it has ever been. Why have we chosen now to lock our minds in the coffin of lost skills? Now, is the greatest time to continue developing our ideas of the world. We have come to a point where we rely too heavily on others to feed us our thoughts. We no longer value an individual mind. A collective mind works well for sharing ideas but where does new thought come from? Today the ones who come up with the new ideas dictate how we think with out us even knowing it. They are in control. The words and ideas they bring to life are passed onto us through the various channels and mediums of media that exist. They give us options though, two or three. This way we can all fall into a category. If we all find familiarity with one of the groups then we will all be happy. Sure we disagree with the other group but that is what they want us to do. We are in a category THEY designed disagreeing with another category THEY designed. We are in truth fighting our self. We must not stand up then against the opposing view but against the creator of the view. This is how progression will be made. The rapid pace of life has tricked us into believing their predisposed truths. These are not real truths. The only real truths are the ones we create. Let today be the today you recognize the trap we have been placed in. We have been ineffectively fighting our self for years. For every step we take forward, we in turn take one back. Let today be the day you realize we must create our own thoughts and beliefs. Do not fall victim to the handcrafted system they have created. We have a choice to be oppressed by believing or free by creating. Let us create. This is our time to be the thinkers. Let us inspire masses to continue the trend and shape the world in our own way. The philosophers of yesterday were important to their time, the philosophers of today are of great importance to you and I, but the philosophers of tomorrow will be of great service to millions and millions of souls to come.